Crew SC embarrassed by new kids Orlando City

The Magic Kingdom wasn't so magical Saturday night for the visitors from Ohio. After posting an early goal to take the lead (Higuain, 5'), they then proceeded to collapse defensively and allowed Orlando City to score five unanswered goals.

Mickey Mouse showing how it's done in Orlando City.

Their defensive form was the worst of Sporting Director/Head Coach Gregg Berhalter's tenure in Columbus. It was so bad, in fact, that Berhalter did not speak to the team post-game. His comments to the press weren't long in the tooth, either.

"I'm disappointed," Berhalter said. "We rolled over and made it easy for Orlando. That's not the type of team we pride ourselves on being. (Saturday night) we were an easy opponent to beat. This time was way below average, not up to MLS standard."

He alluded to changes in the lineup ahead of next week's match versus the Colorado Rapids. What those changes are remain to be seen.

Has Gregg Berhalter run dry of ideas?

My colleague Larry Johnson, posting on Twitter, summed up the 5-2 loss rather succinctly. "At some point, you've got to question effort. Orlando had zero fear of Columbus. #CrewSC need more players that have played in games that matter. Coach treats regular season like exhibition to the press.Now guys play like it."

They may be near the top of the Eastern Conference standings, but their form is more consistent with a team near the middle-to-bottom. More than "tweaks" are called for. Accountability and responsibility have to become hallmarks of the club. This starts at the top. They have allowed 8-goals against in just the last two matches. No matter how you slice it, this is not good.

The coming days will show how much change head coach Gregg Berhalter is willing to enforce. One thing that is certain is that something has to change to get the teams' psyche in the right place.

The Improbable Book From Vidda "JibJab" Grubin

Vidda Grubin is a writer, author, poet, contributor to Helltown and he has a new book you should check out. My first experience with it was while I was travelling to Orlando for a sign and graphics trade show, a visual experience, to say the least, but all I remember for that trip are images this in my head from Vidda's book. Once you're in, you're in - from there it's one of the best rides you'll ever get on. [Purchase Helton Janglom’s Template for Life on Vidda’s HERE]
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THE IMPROBABLE BOOK FROM VIDDA "JIBJAB" GRUBIN

Helton Janglom’s Template for Life

What happens when Helton Janglom's challenging but enchanted life collides with the confusingly cynical world of Hsrah Macs Macs, yogi monk from the planet Coinfenced? Quite a bit...and not all of it good.

If Helton and his friends, Alya and Bird, can successfully navigate riots, scam artists, oceans, and delinquent parents, and Hsrah can stay a step ahead of the American Department of Justice, while managing not to be slaughtered by a murderous three-armed heathen from Coinfenced, there is bound to be some pick-up soccer and a few hands of poker played. Maybe, just maybe, one or two miracles will join the world of scam artists and eleven-year-old runaways.

The probability of even one miracle is slim, but in Helton's universe the improbable seems to happen way more than is realistically probable. Certainly the Gua Gua know the odds are good. Don't they?

The Author

Vidda "JibJab" Grubin lives in the stream. He tends to make earthly appearances without a set schedule. What fun is a schedule? He has written a number of novels (not many, but the number is greater than one), kids short stories, some poetry and too many articles and outlandish prognostications about the beguilingly beautiful sport of soccer. Vidda's favorite food is Gua Gua. His favorite place is hiking and his favorite random time destroyer is poker. He's not good at the damn game, but where else can one find the whole of humanity generally getting along? As always, Vidda hopes you help create everything in a moderately positive fashion. There's so much empty space out there. If you're going to fill a tiny bit of the void, please, the very least you can do is smile inside.

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Purchase Helton Janglom’s Template for Life on Vidda’s Create Space page: HERE

Or on Amazon. And for goodness sakes, watch out for tiny meteors!

A Chant Too Far...

There's an undercurrent of misogyny that happens at MAPFRE Stadium with alarming frequency. Those being misogynistic may very well not even know that their chants are harmful or even what the word misogyny means. Look it up, kids. Knowledge is Power.

Jeff Regensburger wrote a post on his own blog about the chants heard from within the stadium on match days. Read his post HERE. He notes that the chants are choreographed and fly in the face of Major League Soccer's campaign of "Don't Cross The Line".

One would have to think that many of those chanting such things have no children of their own. If they do, would they think it's okay for those kids to hear these chants? And while it may not seem that harmful to those participating, what if you had a daughter that was hearing such things on a weekly basis? 

Major League Soccer has made their stance on such things pretty clear. Nowhere within the phrase "Unity, Inclusion, Respect, Fair Play" does the word misogyny fit. In other words, "Don't Cross The Line".

Is there a place for chants at a soccer match? Of course there is. It's part of the fabric and the culture in which we enjoy the game of soccer. But when it drives people away from the game, is that a good thing? Can MLS and the Columbus Crew SC afford to have people take their money elsewhere? 

"Well, as you know, I always thought we tried to go a chant too far."

[PODCAST] Red Cards in Helltown: Season 2, Episode 11

There he goes, one of God's own prototypes. A high powered mutant of some kind. Never considered for mass production. Too weird to live, too rare to die. Rick Gethin and Larry Johnson are back this week with the latest and greatest way to spend an hour in 2015.

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01:30 - HEADLINES
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► Gold Cup, USMNT v Panama
► US players - can see the bottom of the pool (as David Burgin would say)
► Were does the US go from "Dempsey, Donovan (and Beasley)"
► Controversy surrounding the Gold Cup
► Fallout from finishing 4th
► Wold Cup Qualifying draw, Concacaf
► MLS All-Star news, Frank Lampard out - Dax McCarty in
► International Champions Cup news

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19:35 - COLUMBUS CREW SC NEWS AND NOTES
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► Crew SC blow a three goal lead, Berhalter not upset (publicly anyway)
► The MLS table is an illuuuussssion, Crew not 2nd place
► Crew got points from Chicago but didn't necessarily look good
► Toronto game not a "tale of two half's"
► Have to recognize that Altidore is looking for a penalty late
► Berhalter audio (24:00)
► Berhalter didn't seem upset about the result
► Player's meeting always a sign of something bad
► What's going on with Pogatetz
► All the Eastern Conference teams giving up the most goals
► MAPFRE STADIUM SELLOUT!! (aka Dollar Beer and Brat Night)
►Berhalter irritated (and arrogant, but that's not all bad)

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37:40 - GENERAL DISCUSSION
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► ...okay, a few good words on Berhalter, managed change very well
► A look at the MLS table, East and West
► East as some garbage teams this year
► LA looked disinterested in the Houston heat (and sprinklers)
► Seattle slide, a look at the Supporters' Shield race
► Drogba talk

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48:40 - QUICK HIT, WRAP UP
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► Opening weekend of EPL coming up
► Appreciating of the honesty of the Premier League structure
► Refreshing, playing once at home and once away. Simple!
► Kudos to NBC Sports Network coverage
► Alexi Lalas, Eric Wynalda opinions of Jurgen Klinsmann
► How did some of the 90s stars get good, is the US regressing?
► US slipping to a level Jamaica is rising to


Thanks for listening! You can also find us on iTunes and Facebook. In fact, 1st listener to email me at ljohnson@helltownbeer.com with what Meram says right at the end of the podcast will get a $20 iTunes gift card. No foolin'!

From Budapest, Ciao Jules...

The family of the late Jules Bianchi joins the current F1
drivers in a minute of silence before the start of the
Hungarian Grand Prix

Cette victoire est pour Jules…

On a somber Sunday afternoon twelve miles outside of Budapest, the first words spoken by race-winner Sebastian Vettel on the podium were dedicated to the first driver to lose his life from a racing incident in 21 years.

Indeed, all three drivers on the podium toasted the heavens with their champagne bottles. Jules Bianchi was just 25 years old when he lost his fight and succumbed to his injuries nine days ago.

It was a day full of emotion and spectacular racing, starting with a minutes silence before the race began. “The minutes silence for Jules before the race was very emotional,” said Fernando Alonso. “But today, we respected Jules and we respected the sport.”

From the opening lap, when the prancing horse of Vettel’s Ferrari surged to the lead and never looked back, Mercedes’ Lewis Hamilton was under the gun to make his car perform. Alas, it was all for naught. Hamilton would wind up serving a drive-thru penalty for causing a collision with Red Bull’s Daniel Riccardo in the waning laps of the race.

Riccardo would survive hits from Williams’ Bottas, Hamilton and Mercedes’ Rosberg to stand on the third step of the podium at race end.

For a track that historically is known for lack of overtaking, the Hungaroring provided some of the most exciting racing of the season. The end results were proof positive of that. In addition to Vettel, Kvyat and Riccardo on the podium, fourth place through tenth were as follows: Verstappen, Alonso, Hamilton, Grosjean, Rosberg, Button and Ericsson.

While the racing was hot and heavy as the drivers jockeyed for position, the penalties meted out post-race matched what was seen on-track.

With the win, Vettel has matched the great Ayrton Senna’s record of 41 race wins and has fully integrated himself within the walls of the team from Maranello, Italy. On his victory lap, he thanked the Ferrari team in Italian for their work in giving him a car with which to win.

Another great sign was both McLaren Honda cars finishing in the top-ten and garnering points, with Alonso finishing fifth and Button in ninth. While they still have a ways to go in hopes of running consistently at the top, the positive steps are there.

The teams now take a three week break before resuming the F1 schedule in the Ardennes at Circuit de Spa-Francorchamps in Belgium. Will Mercedes return to the top of the podium? Will Ferrari replicate their result from Budapest? Or will the leader-board be rewritten once again?

Lewis Hamilton and Mercedes AMG top qualifying in Hungary

Fernando Alonso pushes his car back to pitlane in Q2

On a scorching day twelve miles outside Budapest where the track temperature hit 129 degrees, Lewis Hamilton topped timing and scoring (1:22:020) in qualifying for the Hungarian Grand Prix at the Hungaroring. He out-paced his factory-Mercedes teammate, Nico Rosberg, by half a second (1:22:595).

Former teammates Sebastian Vettel (Ferrari - 1:22:739) and Daniel Riccardo (Red Bull - 1:22:774) round out the second row.

The remainder of the top ten: Kimi Raikkonen (P5, Ferrari - 1:23:020), Valtteri Bottas (P6, Williams - 1:23:222), Daniil Kvyat (P7, Red Bull - 1:23:332), Felipe Massa (P8, Williams - 1:23:537), Max Verstappen (P9, Toro Rosso - 1:23:679) and Romain Grosjean (P10, Lotus - 1:24:181).

Q2 saw a red flag as Fernando Alonso nursed his broken McLaren Honda to he side of the track at the entrance to pitlane. With the help of track marshals, Alonso pushed his car to the team's garage. Unable to rejoin the qualifying session, Alonso will start 15th, one position in front of his McLaren teammate Jenson Button.

"Jenson had a problem with the KERS and for me with the car switched off," said the Spaniard. "Not the right time, but hopefully we learn for tomorrow."

With teammates Hamilton and Rosberg locking out the front row yet again, coupled with the notoriously difficult to overtake Hungaroring, Mercedes AMG will likely extend their constructors championship lead, barring any mechanical setbacks.

Finlay, Kamara Tops

Updating my numbers tonight. Kei Kamara and Ethan Finlay still hanging in the top 10 in MLS. Added 2015 salaries to the image above. Lots of good players in MLS outside the million dollar guys, for what it's worth.

New Position for Kenwyne Jones???

Sooo...this might be ludicrous, buuut...Kenwyne Jones seems like the type of fellow who would be open to a significant position change.

Captains his Trinidad and Tobago national team. All-around good guy from most accounts. Could possibly extend his career a couple years...

Central Back???

Would add speed to a backline lacking in the same, with the exception of Waylon Francis on the left.

Just a...thought? Anyway, clearly, he's the kind of player who immediately adds depth at multiple positions. The kind of player who could help the Crew anywhere he steps on the field.

Fédération Internationale de Football Association (USD)

"A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool." - Ancient English Proverb (...William Shakespeare). The English have a long history of such things, jesters and all. Today, no different. And it was good. US Dollars and all (looking at you USSF. Chuck Blazer. Gold Cup!).

1- For the first time in history, Sepp Blatter does not receive his money in a briefcase. Change. pic.twitter.com/uZSfCKJZJs

— The Antique Football (@AntiqueFootball) July 20, 2015

Bring football back under the stewardship of England. For the good of the game.