Thursday, August 7, 2014

Every Other Soccer Fan in the United States

"What a game! Major League Soccer is making huge strides."

"The all-stars played okay."

"What do you mean, okay? They attacked, created two wonderful goals and beat Bayern Munich, probably the best club team in the world."

"Don't get all excited. Bayern didn't start three or four of its top players. Franck Ribery and Arjen Robben didn't even enter the game until there was twenty minutes left."

"Wait a minute. Just the other day you were singing the praises of Manchester United when they beat the LA Galaxy 7-0. You wouldn't shut up about how bad Major League Soccer's level of play is compared to the top leagues in the rest of the world."

"That's not the same thing. Manchester United took the game seriously. Bayern was looking for a nice easy scrimmage. Those MLS thugs don't seem to know the difference between a game that matters and a training exercise."

"Let me get this straight. Your saying that if an MLS side gets thrashed by a Euro side, it's sure proof that Major League Soccer is complete crap. But, and this is a doozy of a double standard, if a Major League Side beats arguably the best team in the world, it's a fluke, the Euro side didn't take it seriously, or the oldie but goodie, the Euro side played mostly bench players?"

"Obviously, you just don't understand soccer. These discussions with you are so infantile."

"Really, you don't see the pathetic need to pump your ego full-to-overflowing with Euro-Snobbery?"

"You just don't get it."

"Yeah, actually, I think I do. I believe, I believe, I believe...You're Full of Shit."

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